Standards of Devotion: Protocols, Etiquette, and Expectations.
A Living DocumentThese protocols exist to create safety, elegance, clarity, and erotic tension — not confusion. They outline how I expect submissives to behave in my presence, in public, in private, and within the broader kink community.
Not every dynamic will require every rule. Protocol is layered, intentional, and earned. But the bare minimum is not optional. If you find yourself bristling at structure, etiquette, or accountability — we are not aligned.
The Bare Minimum: Basic Etiquette
How I expect every submissive I interact with to behave. These are not “kink rules.” These are standards.
Open doors for me.
Pull out my chair.
Stand when I enter the room.
Do not begin eating until I do.
If dining family-style, I make final ordering decisions.
Use proper table manners: fork and knife, napkin on lap.
Cover your mouth when coughing.
If you struggle with basic social etiquette, you will struggle with serving me.
Communication and Behavior Standards
I choose to invest my time and energy in submissives who take pride in formality, structure, and adherence to a code of conduct (the intersection of mine and their own)
The effort a submissive makes to honor the power dynamic is palpable. It shows in how you speak, how you write, how you wait, and how you carry yourself — even, and especially, when nothing explicitly erotic is happening. In public settings, this formality becomes more subtle, but there are always ways to demonstrate awareness, restraint, and respect for your place within the dynamic.
At times, I may soften my tone or allow moments of informality in how I speak to you. It does not signal a relaxation of expectations. You are never meant to become overly comfortable.
Honorifics & Formal Speech (In Person + Text)
In private, you are always expected to address me as Mistress or Mistress Neena. These honorifics are not optional; they are part of how the dynamic is maintained and respected.
I strongly dislike casual, dismissive, or single-word responses such as “yeah,” “sure,” or “nope.” They read as lazy, overly familiar, and inattentive. I much prefer full, deliberate responses such as “Yes, Mistress,” “No, Mistress,” or “If it pleases you, Mistress.” You are expected to write and speak in complete sentences, with attention to grammar, spelling, and clarity.
How you communicate with me is a direct reflection of how seriously you take the dynamic — and, in turn, how seriously I will take you.
Time Awareness & Arrival Protocols
On time is the expectation — not early, not late.
Tardiness and last-minute cancellations are unacceptable. Disrespecting my time is one of the fastest ways to lose access to me. I am extremely punctual and expect the same in return.
Early arrival is not a courtesy. I value privacy and preparation time before sessions, dinners, and events, and unexpected early arrivals disrupt that process. If you arrive early, do not announce yourself or linger nearby. Take a walk and return precisely when instructed.
If you are delayed, apologize clearly without excuses and assume our time will still end as originally scheduled. Extensions may be offered at your expense and are granted at my discretion.
Gifts & Tribute
Never show up empty-handed.
Tribute does not need to be extravagant; it needs to be thoughtful. Some of the most meaningful gifts I have received were small, observant, and perfectly timed — incense I still use over a year later, or an insulated travel mug that appeared exactly when I needed one. These gestures demonstrated attentiveness, not excess.
Grand gestures are welcome as well. Designer packaging will certainly set the mood, but intention will always matter more to me than price alone.
There are, however, clear boundaries. Do not bring alcohol or sweets without asking first. I dislike waste, and I do not always want sugar or alcohol. Likewise, avoid large gifts when I am traveling, as luggage space is limited and practicality matters. A thoughtful gifting guide will be linked separately.
Body Language & Posture
You are expected to carry yourself in a way that communicates humility at all times. Your posture, stance, and physical presence should reflect awareness of your role within the dynamic.
Avoid power postures such as standing with your hands on your hips, legs spread apart, or arms raised or casually draped while leaning. These positions read as entitled, relaxed, or dominant and are inappropriate in my presence.
When in doubt, default to a contained and composed posture. Stand with your feet close together, your hands resting at your sides or placed behind your back. In high protocol settings, your head should be slightly bowed. If you are ever uncertain about how to position yourself, stillness is always the correct choice.
Discretion
Discretion in my world is mutual and absolute. Gossip, misrepresentation, or oversharing, whether within the scene, on social media, or in any public context, will result in the termination of our dynamic.
If an issue arises, you are expected to speak to me directly. I value honest communication and I do not punish respectful vulnerability. Bringing concerns to me privately is always the correct path; taking them elsewhere is not.
Expectations & Promises
I do not assume ownership, exclusivity, or entitlement over anyone unless it is explicitly requested by you. Autonomy and informed consent matter to me, and I will never impose a level of commitment that has not been clearly and intentionally agreed upon.
However, once exclusivity or a specific expectation is offered and accepted, I take that commitment very seriously. Promises made to me are not symbolic gestures or fantasy language — they are declarations of intent. I expect them to be honored with consistency, integrity, and follow-through.
You should never make commitments, set expectations, or offer forms of devotion that you cannot realistically maintain. Overpromising, people-pleasing, or offering exclusivity as a way to impress me will ultimately damage trust. I would much rather engage with a submissive who is honest about their limits than one who makes grand declarations they cannot sustain.
Clarity protects both of us. If your circumstances, availability, or capacity change, it is your responsibility to communicate that promptly and directly. Silence, avoidance, or broken promises erode the foundation of any dynamic and will be addressed accordingly.
Accountability
Mistakes happen, and protocol will occasionally be broken. Perfection is not the expectation — awareness, ownership, and growth are.
What matters most is how you respond when a mistake is made. Defensiveness, excuses, or attempts to minimize your behavior will only compound the issue. I expect you to acknowledge missteps clearly, take responsibility without prompting, and remain receptive to correction.
Correction and punishment are not expressions of anger or cruelty; they are tools for alignment, learning, and reinforcement of the dynamic. You are expected to accept both calmly and gracefully. Resistance or resentment signals a lack of readiness for the level of structure and authority I maintain.
Accountability is not about shame. It is about maturity, trust, and the ability to be guided.
Character & Emotional Maturity
I only engage with people who are reliable, honest, emotionally mature, transparent, and grounded. These qualities must be demonstrated consistently, not selectively.
This standard applies equally to submissives and clients. Without emotional regulation, accountability, and clear communication, trust cannot exist — and without trust, there is no dynamic.
Mental Health Responsibility
You are expected to take responsibility for your mental health. I am supportive and compassionate, particularly with long-term submissives, but there is a clear distinction between moments of vulnerability where support is requested and ongoing trauma dumping, self-destructive behavior, or depressive spirals without accountability.
If you are struggling, you are expected to take action — whether that means therapy, medication, lifestyle changes, or building stronger support systems. I can be a source of care, but your healing and stability are ultimately your responsibility.
Financial Health
You are expected to serve within your means and budget responsibly. Do not ask for discounts or free play, and never take on debt in order to serve me. I do not financially ruin submissives. Self-control, financial awareness, and restraint are part of devotion.
Family & Real Life
If you are married or have children, your family comes first. Their health, safety, and stability are non-negotiable. I understand that for many, kink needs are unmet within primary relationships. My hope is that serving me allows you to return to your life more grounded and fulfilled — not destabilized. I do not engage in true home-wrecking.
Health Transparency
You are expected to be fully transparent about all relevant health matters. This is non-negotiable.
For transmissible conditions, transparency is about protecting me and others. I will not judge you for having an STI, STD, or any other transmissible virus or bacteria. The honorable and responsible choice is full disclosure with all play partners — including professionals — so that informed decisions can be made and appropriate precautions can be taken.
For non-transmissible conditions, transparency is about protecting you. I need a clear understanding of any health issues, disabilities, illnesses, medications, or injuries you may have in order to safely guide you through scenes and avoid accidental harm. Withholding this information compromises safety and trust.
Social Environments: Dinners, Events & Public Settings
Representation & Awareness
In social kink spaces, you are an extension of me. Your behavior directly reflects on my reputation, standing, and professional image. This awareness should guide every choice you make in public settings.
If you attend a play party with me, you are expected to remain by my side unless instructed otherwise. Wandering, disappearing into other conversations, or pursuing other Mistresses without permission is not acceptable. Playing with other Mistresses must always be approved by me. A brief scene with someone I trust is often fine; repeatedly asking throughout the evening is not. Your primary focus should remain on me and on maintaining the integrity of the dynamic.
Speaking & Presence
When I am conversing with other Mistresses, you are expected to take a backseat. Do not interrupt me or anyone I am speaking with. Keep your volume, body language, and energy regulated at all times.
Nervous excitement is not an excuse for poor behavior. Quiet confidence, restraint, and awareness are far more attractive than overeagerness or performative submission.
Drinking
Protocol determines expectations around alcohol.
In low protocol dynamics, you may not need to ask permission to drink, but you may never exceed the number of drinks I have had.
In medium or high protocol dynamics, you must ask permission before consuming alcohol.
We remain on the same wavelength. Getting drunk around me is unacceptable unless we are intentionally indulging together.
Bills & Payments
Meals and drinks are always covered by the submissive. Mistresses should never have to reach for the bill or manage payment logistics.
If there is one submissive at a table with multiple Mistresses, that submissive covers the entire bill. If there are multiple submissives present, they are expected to coordinate the split discreetly amongst themselves. This should be handled smoothly and without drawing attention. I should never have to think about it.
Drink Service
I alternate between alcoholic drinks and water. Attentiveness here matters.
When my alcoholic drink is nearly finished, you should have water ready. When I am finishing a glass of water, you should ask whether I would like another drink. I may decline or request more water. Your role is not to anticipate incorrectly, but to remain observant and responsive.
Awareness, not assumption, is what makes service elegant.
Medium & High Protocol Expectations
Personal Service
Under medium and high protocol, service extends beyond obedience into constant awareness and physical presence. You are expected to always offer to hold my bag and to treat anything in your care as an extension of me. My property is never placed on the ground without permission. If you lose or damage something that belongs to me, punishment will follow, with severity determined by the value and circumstances.
When we are walking together, you remain one step behind me unless instructed otherwise. At any time, in public or in private, I may choose to use you as a functional object — a footstool, seat, or table — or place you on a leash or in a collar. These decisions do not require advance notice.
Domestic Service
Domestic service is performed naked or in femme attire, always in chastity. When cooking, full-coverage panties are required.
Slave positions must be memorized and executed with urgency when commanded. Hesitation is not acceptable.
You are responsible for cleaning all toys and furniture after use, regardless of whether I used them with you or another submissive. My cleaning protocols and preferences must be known by heart and followed precisely. Carelessness in this area is treated as a failure of responsibility, not ignorance.
High Protocol
High protocol demands heightened stillness, restraint, and vigilance. Your back is never turned to me unless explicitly instructed. You do not speak unless spoken to. If you need to speak or ask a question, you are to raise a finger and wait to be acknowledged.
If I place you in a specific position or location, you remain there until released, regardless of discomfort or distraction.
At events, if I raise my finger above my head, you are being summoned. You have five seconds to reach my side. You are expected to maintain constant awareness of where I am so that you do not miss this signal.
I may choose to loan you to other Mistresses. You may offer service, but you may not ask to play. Loanership is initiated by me alone.